My new laptop arrived, it is very exciting! and it is a lot faster than my old one, for sure, I can tell already.

la la la...

I did not go see psychiatric-man because I had just got it delivered and I was EXCITED and then I went out to get the bus and I waited and then there were two at once and the first was busy so then I tried to stop the second one and he kept driving and I went AHHHH and was UNHAPPY so I went back inside. I think that was fair.

I had to go see a doctor this morning to renew my prescription and it was a locum and he tried to tell me the basics about depression and I just, y'know, pretended to agree in order to get out of there as fast as possible.

New 'puter! Yayz!
Since I last posted I have:

posted a fic here.

got new glasses - my prescription had changed, and I got to do the flashy-lights field-of-vision thing which I never had to do before, that was exciting.

bought two bras! It took me ages to get round to it but I was actually down to only one that fit. The whole thing was actually surprisingly painless.

bought a new laptop, which was just last night, actually, I have been poking at ebay for while and finally picked a T60 ThinkPad (I am currently using a T23, and it has been irritatingly slow and does not do DVDs or have a touchpad).

posted some pyrography pictures here.

Actually I have bought quite a lot of stuff recently, I realised money was building up in my account and went, hey! I could actually buy things! So, some books, and a hat, and some crafty stuff. Quite a bit of crafty stuff, actually, I have a whole pile of stuff waiting to be burned on. Oh well what the hell.
I just measured myself and it was depressing even though I don't really care about these things. And I already knew I had a big head, I shouldn't be annoyed that I apparently take an XL. (This was what prompted the measuring; I was randomly looking at hats and didn't know what size I would be.) I'm allowed to be annoyed that my latest ebay purchase probably won't fit because I misremembered my waist, though. Meh, bah, etc.

Parentals have buggered off for the week which is quite nice really, except for the part where the flat is so close to done we could probably have finished it this week if they hadn't; also sister was here for a couple of days and we took stuff to the flat and went to Ikea (and I managed not to buy anything! ...this time)

Today I ignored the phone then I got out of bed and took two buses to see psychotherapist-man and found out he had called in sick, which was what the phone call was about. Actually I was quite happy about that because I was not in a talking mood at all, so I went to the flat and did a little cleaning and a little plastering and finally took the horrible doors off the cupboard, which I wanted to do months ago but paternal stopped me for reasons that apparently made sense to him. Then I went to B&Q and did not actually get the paint I went for because it was not on the shelf and of course I could not ask a person, but I did get the other stuff on my list; also I saw a quite cheap big playmat with roads on which I may have to buy instead of a grown-up rug, for the time being at least. I can has style, dammit.

I plan to do stuff tomorrow but it depends on me waking up. Also on the weather. It rained today and I would not have left the house if not for the appointment that I didn't really have. I think that is fair. And if I sleep tomorrow I should wake up the next day. So. Yes.
blah blah blah stuff

Wednesday I managed to miss the bus and have to walk home after jewellery class, that was fun, and there was a whole mental conversation which basically put the parentals in a lose-lose situation, so it was probably a good thing they were in bed by the time I got back.

Saturday and Sunday did stuff at the flat, papering walls mostly (this is annoying because it's really a one-and-a-half-person job, at least the way dad does it, and I end up being the half-person and I still manage to do things wrong).

Also on Saturday had great-aunt-ish over (there's a half-relation in there somewhere, but I'm not sure if it's her generation or the one before) because it was her birthday last week (and I don't know how old she is - eighty-some, I think) and there was talking and ugh.

Monday was supposed to go to the flat again. Stayed in bed instead, did not even get up for tea. Nearly waited to eat until they had gone to bed, but I had to wash anyway so I had a shower and when encountered stepmother just went blank, and she didn't try to talk to me, so that was OK.

Tuesday, saw the psycho again, he totally thinks I have daddy issues. And I was saying how I prefer logic to emotion and I don't like talking or even thinking about emotional issues and he said, "this must be very hard for you then," as if it was some kind of revelation and not something I'd told him at least three times already.

And I went to the shop and got an air mattress and a duvet so I can now sleep at the flat if I so choose. I mean, there's not much else I can do there, but sleep is always good.

Also also I went to the flat and I was wet because of rain so I put my jeans on the radiator (hooray for working heating!) and did some paint stripping in knickers & boots, and managed to hit my knee with the hot-air gun, so I have an interestingly shaped burn.
I thought I had lost my camera, having gone round the room looking in and under things, but I picked up one more thing and there it was. Huzzah.

I have this bad habit, you see, of putting things in visible places and then putting other things on top of them, or knocking them over, or suchlike. Occasionally I put things in 'safe places' - this is a family joke, because my mother used to do that, and then forget where exactly said place was, and we once got christmas presents in, um, April? Or I toss things down at random. Or I put a bunch of unrelated things in a bag, usually to take them downstairs or bring them back, and then I leave them there, and when I look in said bag I'll only see what's on top and assume that's what that bag is for. So. My life would be easier if I was tidier. Or had less stuff. Or had more storage. (I can't wait to be in my flat.)

Also, having worn my copper ring for no more than two hours, my thumb has a greenish tinge to it. Yay.
Am mildly dead.

Finally went to the flat today, spent about three hours taking off cork tiles - some of them came off remarkably easily, which meant I didn't get terribly frustrated. I did however skin about half my knuckles. Heh. Also the man returned our ladders so I can strip the wallpaper up high in the bathroom.

Also I went to B&Q on my own on the way home. It is a little inconvenient and a little intimidating but it is really nice to be able to wander as I wish instead of following dad around (he always spends ages in the wrong aisles, dammit). And I bought green paint for the broken doorframe that has been like an advertisement that the front door was once kicked in. And I picked up a bunch of the sample cards to look at colours for the walls. I'm still considering. Oh, but I definitely need white gloss for the woodwork which is nasty and yellowed. La-la-la... I should dig out the rug to check colours. Yes.

Still lots of cleaning to do, a bit more stripping, some papering, then a bunch of painting. Then furnishing. Ah, hell, the hard shit's done.
Ugh. So, yesterday, after not-sleeping, I went into town for my medical services appointment to say 'please tell them I am useless at life so they will keep giving me money'. I even left my hair skanky, because that seemed to help last time.

Last time, I waited two hours. This time, my appointment was at three, I was slightly late, and the wait was supposedly over an hour (and I'd waited, oh, fifteen minutes already) so now I have a new appointment in two weeks. Ugh, ugh, blah.

However, it did mean I finally went to John Lewis like I've been meaning to for over a month and bought the stuff to finish (wait, not finish one of them... bah) two projects. And then I came home and then I went to bed early and now I am awake at five in the morning.

Also, it was sunny and somewhat warm. It was very odd.
So, I seem to be nocturnal again, and woke up late, so had to cadge a lift to metal class, and was blah and grump and end-all-humans.

The teacher forgot he said I could try welding and I was too argh to remind him. Also he was making suggestions for the head that I did not like and I failed to say, "no, look, this." I may actually make the head out of drinks cans before next week.

Then I came home. And was some more blah. Then I thought, hey. I've been meaning to cut my hair for weeks now, and it's actually clean. And I dithered for a while, but eventually, I cut it off.

a few pictures )

Oddly, looking in my "me" gallery, in the last set of photos I uploaded, my hair is not much longer than it is now, which means those photos must be from about three years ago.

Also the jewellery I bought a few nights ago arrived, so I have rings in my ears and navel. The ears took some effort, because earrings have been special-occasion-only for quite a while, which does not equate to very often; which is why I bought some plain silver rings, to wear lots.
That makes five days I haven't managed to go to the shop despite meaning to. Though I did go to other shops and keep myself somewhat supplied with caffeine. Sigh.

I have, however, been to two choir rehearsals and a metal class. And next week I will do the same and I'm going to learn to weld!

And I took Laa out and we signed up for a jewellery making class. And then I also signed up for stained glass making, and was the first one on the list - hopefully there will be enough people by the time it starts. We had to sign up for jewellery now, though, because it is one of the popular ones, with two classes and one was already full.

And I have spent a ridiculous amount of time looking at tiles on the internet. First it was pricing (bottom end, which is the idea, is £5-15 per sqm; but some people apparently pay over £100 per sq m, which would mean my not-large bathroom costing a couple of thousand, which is insane, and these people probably have much larger rooms and pay somebody else to tile them. Though I admit the Live Glass ones are pretty - they're kind of like those ridged cards with changing pictures that you used to get, with stripes of glass that change colour depending on the angle you're at. But I still gawp at the price.) but then I got involved in thinking about my kitchen - which is just, like, sink, fridge, cooker, two metres wide, with wall cabinets as well, and I was going... oh, these ones come in half-metre-squared packs, I could use a few different shades of blue... or ooh, those red ones are awesome, and those black ones, I could just buy a few and use them as accents in plain white... or oh, I do like those mosaic-y ones even though they're a bit expensive, and it's not like I'd need many of them... Essentially doing what I did when I was shoe-shopping. Not good, self, not good. (ETA: sweet jebus, some of the mosaic ones are over £200. wait, no. £300 per sq m. My gast is flabbered.)(ETAA: brushed-effect metal mosaic, actually quite pretty, nearly £40 per sheet... 11 sheets per square metre. My jaw, it is dropped.)

Speaking of shoe-shopping, there was a magazine I picked up waiting somewhere, and it had people who organise people's wardrobes, and one of said organising people said, "The average girl has 50-100 pairs of shoes and 40 pairs of trousers." I got rid of about half my shoes because I thought twenty pairs was far too many. And I may have ten pairs of trousers but I doubt more than half of them are actually wearable. So. Y'know. I'm amused. I forget that people think I'm strange.
I just went to Ikea and I only took half an hour and I only spent ten quid more than I intended so that is a big success. I was planning on going other places but did not realise how heavy/awkward stuff would be so I am home again and will go places tomorrow.

I got: 200 tealights (this was the impetus - G called a couple of nights ago, she wants them for the wedding reception, she had meant to get them from the supermarket but the checkout girl told her they were crap, so.)
24 bigger candles (in the same style, as an option)
MY CLOCK (that I have been meaning to buy for aaaaaaaages but possibly should have put off a little longer so I, y'know, had somewhere to put it.)
an organizer thing (that is supposed to hang on a rail which I do not currently have. um.)
two multisockets (a pack of two, that is, and they are odd-looking but should be useful)
two packets of Pepparkakor (biscuits that I adore)
and a box of heart-shaped chocolates (to tease G with)

And an ice-cream, of course. And at one point I saw a streak of red on it, and thought, 'accidental strawberry sauce?' then realised that no, I had cut my mouth with the wafer cone. I win at life, clearly.

Tonight I am going to the shopping centre with stepmother to look for shoes for me for the wedding. I do not really need shoes but they might be nice. And it should pacify her, also. Yah.

ETA: Two hours. Shoes and hair things each and a bag for her (I do not want a bag and if I do then I will finish my skull bag and use that despite its gross inappropriateness. So there.
Saturday was my sister's hen night. We had a meal at a nice little restaurant (I had a Peking pizza - roast duck and plum sauce - yum) that doesn't have a liquor licence, so you bring your own. G brought twelve bottles of wine for tasting, to pick which ones to serve at the wedding. Most of us got rather drunk. I woke up with mysterious bruises, a twisted ankle, and a re-pulled arm muscle. It was an excellent night.

I wore my halter top (see icon), fabulous shoes and an excellent skirt that I bought on Thursday for more money than I planned on spending. I went into M&S for jeans and tights, and came out with jeans, tights, and two skirts (the other one of which I later discovered I was charged for twice, so I intend to go see about that soon).

On Monday I got up, looked outside, said, "oh, it's snowing," and went back to bed. Yesterday was much the same, with, "oh, snow's gone, it's all wet,"; in the evening there was choir, and we started out upstairs (which is colder) because of a meeting, so I was very glad of my four layers of clothing. Today I went to the shop and bought a big pile of sugary crap. And I made paternal go to B&Q to get the last kitchen cabinet, and I asked him about getting a sander (because last week we were sanding by hand, and it was not fun) and he said we already have one. So I pouted at him and we're going to try it once we can do stuff again. Currently there are men doing things to the flat. Things that involve pulling up floors. And putting in steel braces because otherwise there isn't enough support for any of the bathroom fixtures. And stuff.
Today I went out for three hours and completed my christmas shopping. Unfortunately I have nowhere near completed my christmas making, but there's... twelve whole days... for me to finish the thing and the thing, and then the other thing... OK. I need to knit faster.

I'd been putting that off all week. Also a phone call, which I made this morning, and which was remarkably painless.

I have to sort out travel. Also do laundry and things. Also I have been cold. A lot. And earlier I was reading huddling-for-warmth fic and went 'ooh, that's what I need, a naked slave.'
I am in the airport waiting for my plane and trying not to freak out and run away because my bag is already checked in and I have bought swedish moneys as well.

agh agh agh.

I am going to check where the airport bus goes, and how to get to the tourist information place. Oh, damn, it seems the information place is not open 24hrs after all. boo.

yeah. I guess I didn't mention part of what I am freaking out about is that, well, I don't have a place to sleep tonight. I'm supposed to get into Stockholm at around half-past-one, and I guess I'm going to wander around for a few hours. I was hoping for an all-night cafe, or something - I was looking at nightlife pages and seeing comments about people going to eat after the clubs close at three or five, and yet... I guess I'll find out. Or just hunker down in the main station for a while.

I am sorted for all the other nights. And I am going to get a tourist card for my three days in Stockholm and go to a bunch of museums, and I am going to go to all the things at the conference, and and and all shall be well once I get past tonight. Eek.

I have my laptop, obviously, and I am sure I will be freaking out at all of you on a regular basis, because there is free wifi in my hostels.

Ooh, there's a salsa club quite close to one of them. That might be fun. Oh, wait, right, I could only possibly go tonight, for the last hour or so, if I could find it, and I don't know what the hell I'd do with my bags. So never mind.

la la la la if I am not online sometime tomorrow night then you're allowed to worry but not until then, 'k?

Oh, here goes, people getting up to line up. Hmm. Maybe I will go to the loo first.
I'm trying to apply for jobs, but I'm just all, Do Not Want, and I am lazy and blah and whatever, y'know? But I did just finish a sock, so I have achieved, and tomorrow... um, this evening, I am going for a climbing lesson, which should be fun. But, yes, lots of DNW, so I started thinking, well, hell, what DO I want?

And, well, I have this fantasy. )

Alternatively, a flat and a cat and a job that didn't actively suck would be great.

um. yes. I bought stuffing off ebay and it arrived today (it is Huge, btw) and I finished the dalek I've been knitting for the last couple of weeks. Squee. It is quite squooshy, as I did not put much stuffing in, but that was for Reasons of Aesthetics, so.

Today has actually been good.

First, we went to the Glasgow Police Museum. cut for blather )

Right. Now I have to go think about being depressed. Bugger.
Coughs and sneezles spread diseazles! (I have been increasingly phlegmy for the last few days, and now am sneezy also. Boo hiss.) (Also, where is that from? Is it Thomas the Tank Engine, or something?)

Today I got called out of my hole to bake something because my great-aunt was coming over for tea. Which was actually surprisingly tolerable.

I have had a ver' busy week, as have started volunteering thing. The work is not boring; the subject matter is fairly interesting, that is, but the adding-associated-people etc, not so much, especially because I have to click through about four screens to do so. Still. On Wed I was doing listed buildings and I learned strange words: a bridge was described in the listing as having "putlog holes" and "stugged rusticated voussoirs" and other such things; the gazetteer description, which I got to write, was more along the lines of "three arches, sandstone" and a smattering of history. (Oh, but it inspired me to go play freerice some more - the levels go past fifty now! it's quite exciting!)

Also I got to go down and wander the stores three times already. I have to go with someone, but it's still fun, and I ran across one of my favourite things from the old Kelvingrove, which is a woodwind instrument called a 'serpent' because it's like a big long recorder but bent so it's only torso-length, and I went "ooh ooh lookit" except not quite, but nearly.

And I've just about worked out the timing of the buses. And I'm going to go tomorrow and get a zonecard, because I've also worked out that. Annnnd.

Oh yes, I have a fic, which I wrote then actually got betaed but then remembered why I don't do that because I'm now scared of it. But I'll do that tomorrow, too, and I'll post it, so there.

And last Sunday was the choir concert, which went fine, and I wore a bowtie, which was fun, except paternal has lost his one which actually ties so it was just velcro which is not as good.

And I have been indulging in strange obsessions again - because I'm procrastinating that fic, and the huge fic, and stuff - and investigating crafty things (and I bought a set of knitting needles. So I guess I'm going to knit stuff. And I now know the difference between English and Continental and can do both, until I forget how, which will probably be soon.) and also green houses - straw bales and Earthships and earthbags, which were new to me and I'm actually quite impressed by, because you just shovel dirt into strong bags - like sandbags - and make them square and use them as bricks. So I think that's the new dream-home, for now. Not that it'll ever happen, but it's fun to think about.
So I had a vaguely exciting morning, in that I had to get up and go to the doctor for a sick line and because I stayed up ridiculously late I only got a couple of hours sleep. Then I went to test the bus to Nitshill, and first I was at the wrong stop, but luckily I realised that and just got to the right one in time, then... Well, I missed where I was supposed to get off, because I'd been looking for the bus to turn right and it actually turned left because I had been reading the stops to check directions but I must have read the stops for the bus going the Other Way. So, yes, somewhat Made of Fail. Fortunately the end of the route was only about ten minutes walk further on, so I walked back and found where I was supposed to be and now I know where to go when I start doing stuff next week.

Then I got the train into town and I went to Bravissimo and I bought two bras and a pair of knickers and I may buy more knickers and a top which they didn't have in stock. And I realised that postage for ordering costs less than bus fare into town. But I am fairly often in town on other business. And I went to Lush and got two bath ballistics and more perfume - American Cream this time. I smell like strawberry icecream.

Then the bus back and I may have freaked out just a little when the guy asked me if I wanted off "here or further on" and, yeah, well, it happens. And I went to the shop and bought crap and also bread which I am now eating. And I decided to be nice so I have a cat on my bed. He is looking at me. And since I am going to be out tonight - rehearsal then pub - I think a nap might be a good idea. Once I am done with lunch, of course.
I wore my shiny boots to choir and made people look at them and they said they were shiny.

This afternoon I cleaned up cat puke, that was fun; it was mostly undigested chicken and on tile, so as far as cat puke goes it was not too bad.


Why is the world not entertaining me??? I mean, sure, I have a list of things to do, and a pile of books I haven't read yet, and a bunch of comms I could surf, and there's even the basic Spanish tapes I started listening to before choir, but... but... but still! Hmmf. Sigh. Etc.
I woke up and I went and got my mysterious package and it is BOOTS what I bought on ebay and they are DMs and they are petrol-blue and they are awfully awfully shiny. And the previous owner must have worn them about twice because they are only a bit creased. So I forgive them for making me get up early. I am now sitting here wearing them and a kaftan which was a previous ebay purchase and is rather colourful.

Now I am awake on a Saturday morning. The weather outside is rather nasty. There's a long list of things I could do. Perhaps I will go bake something. Hmm. Not a bad idea, at that.
On Sunday I made a list of four things to do. Admittedly, one was to buy some books, and I meant to do them all on Monday, but they have now all been done! and the books arrived today, and I have made *counts* four phone calls this week! which is super-awesome by my standards, and, and, y'know what else is super-awesome?

I have a volunteer placement! I am going to spend three months doing stuff for a museums project - adding keywords and such to database entries, mostly, which I guess is not too exciting, but the stuff it's about is, and the people seemed nice, and... I made the first call on Tuesday! and then yesterday I called back the lady at the place to organise a time to go in and she asked if I was free that afternoon so I went in and now it is all sorted! I don't start for two weeks, because stuff still needs sorted on that end, but that gives me time to sort out stuff with the Jobcentre and, I dunno, other stuff.




June 2012

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