kbk

Since I last posted I have:

posted a fic here.

got new glasses - my prescription had changed, and I got to do the flashy-lights field-of-vision thing which I never had to do before, that was exciting.

bought two bras! It took me ages to get round to it but I was actually down to only one that fit. The whole thing was actually surprisingly painless.

bought a new laptop, which was just last night, actually, I have been poking at ebay for while and finally picked a T60 ThinkPad (I am currently using a T23, and it has been irritatingly slow and does not do DVDs or have a touchpad).

posted some pyrography pictures here.

Actually I have bought quite a lot of stuff recently, I realised money was building up in my account and went, hey! I could actually buy things! So, some books, and a hat, and some crafty stuff. Quite a bit of crafty stuff, actually, I have a whole pile of stuff waiting to be burned on. Oh well what the hell.

So, my neighbour plays this sleep-music. At least, I assume that's what it is, because I've been hearing it at night; and I only hear a bit of it, and it's only when it's quiet outside... but that's when I'm trying to sleep, and it bugs the crap out of me.

So I'm wondering if it would be politer to write a note or to knock on the door and attempt talking. Because maybe he's trying to drown me out and we're getting into an escalating situation; I mean, I doubt it, but maybe my music was a little loud earlier, I dunno.

Crap. Bugging. Bugging the crap. Part of the reason I stayed up horrendously late last night and so wound up sleeping all day today instead of going to Key. Agh.

Seem to be coming down with a minor plague. Sigh.

Am now doing three days a week at Key. Am a bit worried my dept will run out of things for me to do and I'll get turfed over to put things in folders one day a week, or something. Maybe I will start taking in my own projects on Fridays.

Had dinner with parentals, it was surprisingly painless - I guess it is easier to tolerate the blah-blah-blather when it is not every day.

Next-door-neighbour's loud girlfriend is visiting. She is American - I know this because I can hear her through the walls. And he seems to use some sleep-music, or something - I've heard it a couple of times, just the top notes coming through, which means it's repetitive and irritating and if I'm trying to get to sleep at three a.m. I need to get some white noise going to block it. At first used radio tuned to static, but this site is useful; I like the brown noise best.

I have not been knitting since I finished the bloomers - I am going to pick one of my yarns out of the stash and find something to make with it.

But right now I am going to attempt sleep.

I got back from Colonsay a few days ago. Since then, I have mostly been sleeping, but today I went to the shop and to parentals for dinner. I have a few hundred photos and I will upload the best at some point soon, but cannot be arsed right now.

I drank lots of tea. I got wet and muddy on a regular basis. My hands have suffered brambles, burns, lots of pulling plants (the sides of my index fingers are callused), and wind-burn; I did have gloves, but they weren't waterproof, so most of the time wearing them was kinda counter-productive. I have a few dozen bruises on my legs. All my clothes smelled of smoke, and it was smoke from rhododendrons and griselinia which smells weird. I reached exciting standards of cold, involving visible breath and hurting nipples (and this was inside the house). My knee has been sore for about a week; it stops hurting after I've been moving for a while, but it goes sore again pretty fast when I stop. Sometimes it was sunny. I saw some pretty cool old stuff of various oldnesses. There were quizzes. I ate a lot. I had someone knock on my door because I was late for breakfast four or five times; I had my own room because of odd gender numbers. I bitched out one of the guys and spent a few minutes shaking afterwards, but he said after that he wasn't upset. I pulled, lopped and sawed a lot of plants. My boots are probably now beyond saving (they were already cracked). I did some cross-stitch. I saw lots of geese and sheep, some cows, various other birds and goats. I walked up and down hills. The ferry was over two hours each way; I like the sea. There were eleven other people and I liked them in varying degrees but I don't think any of them are friends for life. Also I don't think I was the least-liked/most-annoying, despite my failings.

It was a good holiday.

I have seen DW and liked it quite a bit. I like Amy more than Eleven so far, but I liked little Amelia even more. But yes, promising, I think. I have not really caught up with flist, it gets weird. And I think now moar sleep.

I realise this is terrifyingly anal of me, but does anyone know the 'authentic' spelling of the first line of To A Mouse? I plan on burning it into a bowl and now I am having conniptions, mostly over cowran vs cow'rin. I've just about decided I prefer sleeket to sleekit. But things may still change. The bowl, y'see, is kind of lumpy, and one lump looks rather like a mouse-face, so that, just sketched out, and then a few stems of wheat-ish-stuff, and the quote running round the rest of it. I think. Ho-hum.

Also I am looking for a quote on touch; frustratingly, a simple search leads mostly to quotations about 'a touch of genius' or the like, instead of the tactile sense. Oh, now I am finding tantric ones, that's helpful; well, closer, but not exactly acceptable.

On the way home, thinking about mirrors (seeing myself and not instantly recognising; the mirror self; that syndrome from that CSI ep with the woman who did not recognise her own reflection; you can touch the mirror but not the mirror self; oh yeah, cats get confused by that all the time) - I was working on one, and walked past a couple.

Also composing philosophical bullshit about the fascination of change to excuse my taking pictures of a demolition site; also the role of photographer as historian rather than artist.

Also now I really ought to sleep as have been awake for over 21 hours. Silly me.

Today at Key I was the Only Person In My Department as the bossman is off on holiday. So the boss from woodwork kept looking in on me, and showed me how to use the spray gun, which was good fun. (The Spray Booth is... not exactly forbidden territory, but there's no reason to go in there unless you are spraying something, and only the bosses tend to do that.) And I got to play my own music instead of Smooth Radio, hah.

I got five different white-ish/yellow-ish goopy/runny/sticky substances on my hands, at least two of which are "avoid contact with skin". That does not include snot, which was successfully contained in a number of tissues. My back is not very happy with me, as I was working on the demon desk (which is very nearly finished!) and thus bent awkwardly a fair amount of the time. It is bloody annoying working on something wobbly, even though it is not nearly as wobbly as it was the first day I sanded it.

That is all that is happening with me right now.

Would anyone like a green jewellery box? Quite old dark-green velvet interior, recently stained green exterior. It has been one of my projects at Key and they said I can have it but I already have jewellery boxes.

I am putting off going to sleep because I have psychotherapist tomorrow. Do Not Want.

I went to the library on the way home to print out a pattern for a woman at Key; I came out with five books. Surprisingly, all non-fiction. One knitting, one self-help, one historical/mathematical, one gender issues and one feminist perspective on the history of embroidery. And one or two bits of info that may be worth following up on; a lecture and a competition.

This morning I nearly went back to bed; I'm kinda glad I didn't. But I didn't want to get up - snooze button like whoa - and I knocked down my glasses and the lens popped out, and then my shoelace broke. And I got the bus into the centre instead of walking because I was running late, and then I actually walked into someone - I thought he was stepping forward and he was stepping back - and then getting off the bus, the driver didn't notice me and I had to say something. And I'd actually been thinking as I walked to the front that something like that happening would just confirm that I should have stayed in bed. Sigh. But a somewhat cute guy on the bus asked me the time, that was ok.

Urgh. OK. Sleep time now. Or at least lie-down-and-close-eyes, because they are not optimal.

The other day - late on Sunday evening, actually - I woke up to find my hand was oddly red. I think it's a reaction to the dye on my pillow, or something, but it's made me pretty glad I sleep with the pillow that way up, because otherwise it would be my face; and my hand is still red. It looks and feels quite like a sunburn, so I have moisturised and hope that will help.

I did not go to therapy today even though I was awake. Last week kinda sucked. I'm not even sure what we were talking about any more, but there were tears and awkward silences. I just remembered he's on holiday next week, woo. I spend a lot of time avoiding thinking. This is probably not good for me but last time I lay quietly and thought, it was about getting another tattoo and/or piercing just for the endorphin buzz, which is basically self-harm that also hurts the wallet. Ugh. This is why I don't have a brain any more, I use too much of it stopping other bits of it from doing anything. And there isn't even anything particularly bad in there.

Now I am going to choir to sing loud things; that is good.

*iz ded*

Got up at eight, which is an obscene time on a Sunday morning, to find toilet overflowing. Finally got the pipe working again around half-eleven, at which time dad arrived (it was kinda spooky, actually) and wanted to start work on the other pipe, so I hung around watching and fetched and carried. I have been up and down those stairs at least two dozen times today and I am TIRED. Yes, I know I am unfit, I plan to work on it, but this is not the way to do it. Also five of those trips were carrying a big bucket of water down to the drain in the road. Anyway. Dad left a bit after one, having unblocked that pipe as well, and bought me some more gas, which is good. I have poured warm salty water down the sinks. The bathroom still smells bad.

I am just back from the shop, because I was in dire need of caffeinated sweeteners (aka diet coke) and food with instructions on it. My legs are sore. I may take a nap now. Of course, a nap now could turn into sleep until tomorrow, but I am a bit incompetent without enough sleep. Last night I nearly gassed myself because I went downstairs and found the blowtorch not working because of cold, so I brought it back up, and forgot to actually turn it off until I smelled it. Sometimes I think if I was braver I'd totally have won a Darwin award by now, because I may be intelligent but that depends on me actually thinking about things.

Ohhhh my. It is cold. It is very cold. I just discovered I have ICE on the INSIDE of my front windows. Admittedly the heating has only just come on, but seriously. Ice. Inside. That's not fair.

Also not fair: I went out about nine this morning to go to Key, only to be told when I got there that they are not open. (Also, one of the staff called me 'petal', and I can think of very few women less petal-like than myself.) So then I came back via the shops, which is good because now I have money on the gas and more food. I did not fall over but there were a few slippy bits.

I have been out the last two days but that was in the afternoon, which was cold, but not quite as bitter as this morning, which was quite a shock to the system.

The drains are not working very well, so I emailed my landlord aka father and he as suggested I could go stay in their house until the weather improves. That would be warmer, but then so would the fiery pits of hell. Probably I will not tell him about the ice inside the windows as then he might try to insist and that could be unfortunate.

I am going to change my heating strategy. I have had it on full, only part of the time. I think it would be better to have it permanently on low, with more as and when. *nods*

I hope you are all warm.