kbk

If they say they will be gone until Saturday, they should damn well STAY GONE until Saturday.

Parentals said Saturday, maybe Friday. Today is Thursday, and they are back, and I am ANNOYED. Partly this is because I have a load of laundry in the tumble dryer which I am not supposed to use and may or may not be able to sneak it out before She notices (though I really hope I do because I am so not up for a bitch-match right now).

Partly this is because I Have Plans, dammit. I was going to wash the pans tonight or tomorrow, I'm going to do stuff at the flat tomorrow, I... agh.

Partly it is because dammit, I was having a Good Day. OK, I stalled about leaving the house, but I went to B&Q and I went and did stuff at the flat and I went to IKEA and only got one more thing than I intended (and also some food but that doesn't count) and... and then I come home and the red car's sitting in the driveway and my good mood goes POOF.

Dammitall anyway.

I have the sneezums. And a headache. I hope it is dust or something and not swine flu.

In other news... um... the flat is very close to being inhabitable, it even has hot water now. I painted half the hall yellow and then paternal managed to 'not see' it when we were over there for two hours.

I actually tried to write a thing the other day, and it didn't really work, but it is good to remember that I can write things and also I only finished and posted at most half of the things I tried to write.

I am going to go for a day to try out doing upholstery at the place for mental people to do stuff, and if I like it I will go two days a week for a while.

ho-hum ho-hum ho-hum

I have been reading some of my old fic - for some reason a couple of people recently favourited one of my HP stories, which made me look in my feedback folder, and I looked at a couple of other things in there and one of them was for a story I did not remember in the slightest, so... Anyway, I really like some of them, mostly from a few years ago, once I had some experience. I can see odd things I've done wrong, or would like to do better, but I like them. Obviously they're tailored to my sense of humour, my idea of a good story, but I still think there's some genuine quality there, and it's really weird for me to think that about something I've done.

In other news, I now have a washing machine and a fridge in the flat, respectively bought from a charity shop and acquired from a colleague of Maureen's. Flooring is due at some point but I believe has been pushed back to next week sometime; painting is progressing but I want to do another coat in the front room, which apparently makes me a perfectionist. *shrugs*

And tomorrow I am going to take a look at a place which gets mental people making furniture and suchlike, and maybe I will start going there. And maybe I will manage to make a phone call. And, shit, I really have to get an appointment at the doctor's because I have now run out of drugs as well as pill.

This week we have been working on the flat, basically full-time, which means I've been getting woken up at nine a.m., which is nasty. Yesterday, though, the parentals were meeting someone for lunch, so we did stuff in the morning then they went out.

I lay down for a nap around 1 p.m. I dozed for a while, then I slept, then I dozed some more, and I didn't actually get up until 11 o'clock this morning, when we went out to look at flooring and bought some for the back room and bathroom (will be delivered, some fitted, on Thursday.)

Anyway, lots and lots of sleep was really nice; also reminds me that when I sleep all day it's not just lack of motivation, it is actually that I seem to need more than 'usual', given I've been sleeping eight hours a night all week.

Oh, now we're going over for a little while more to fit some skirting. Whoo.

I keep forgetting to post but I am in Newcastle with an edithmatilda and a Kitten and a Jack and a Clancy, and have been since Wednesday, and shall be until tomorrow.

I wore my new boots and did not realise that given how new they were they would need broken in so I took some skin off the back of my ankles and immediately upon arrival went to find flip-flops, which I have been wearing since. It was very hot and sunny. Then the sky opened and threw water at us.

I have yet more burns on me. Ho-hum.

Hum-ho.

...and I was worried I was going to sleep in.

Have now been awake for two hours. Need to go to the flat by one, and shower before then. Given my usual schedule, this could have been a problem, so I did set two alarms.

I wonder, is it the caffeine, the excitement, or just one of those things?

re: caffeine, I spent nearly a week not drinking any, but I am back on it now and probably getting way too much.

re: excitement, I should finally be getting something I bought on ebay a month ago and have been trying to organise delivery of since.

eek

Today =/= my day.

I failed at getting up early enough to do anything in the daytime. I went to class, but I was late because I moronically missed my stop and then had to wait half an hour for the train back. I tried to do a couple of different things in class and thus did not finish anything, except I fixed a necklace for Maureen (and she was very impressed about it, btw).

And I just tipped about half a pint of water off my bedside table. My bedroom, btw, is full of crap. And also down there is the power block for my 'puter, and such things. So. I had to pick up a bunch of crap, and I binned some of it, which I guess is good, and I found the tweezers I lost a few weeks ago, and the CD I lost a few weeks before that. And a spider.

And while I was rushing out of the room to get tissue or something, I - not wearing jeans - got caught on the plate (where the doorknob catches, y'know the thing) by my knickers.

I would say I'm not planning on moving from my bed, but I was here when I knocked the glass over. So maybe I'll just go to sleep and hope tomorrow works out.

Why am I awake at this hour? Apart from the part where I've been sleeping fourteen hours at a time most of this week, so four hours tonight is not that surprising. Anyway. I thought I might start reading my latest book, but during the Introduction I realised I was hungry, and then it just felt weird, because the book is Cannibalism and Human Sacrifice by Garry Hogg, which is apparently a classic work on the subject, first published in 1958. It has made me raise my eyebrows sceptically a few times already, though.

A quote: "it has been widely found that when the taste for human flesh is once indulged, such taste quickly develops into a fierce and eventually unappeasable lust for flesh which no mere animal flesh can ever satisfy".

I was thinking about doing things today but if I can sleep later maybe I will do that instead. I am lazy, after all. Ho-hum.

I just freaked myself out.

As edithmatilda could tell you, I've been obsessing about cannibalism for a week or so now. It started with a crappy bit of fic in my head, and it has not quite reached book-buying stage, but I have been reading bits and pieces. (Actually, I was reading about serial killers a couple of weeks back - I forget why... no, I was reading wikipedia for QI and there was a link and so on. And I just finished knitting this hat which I saw a while back and thought was awesome. Still have to block it and sew bits, though.) Anyway, I'm fairly comfortable with my weirdness, morbidness, etc.

On the bus today, coming back from getting drugs (god, drugs! I ran out two days ago and yesterday was curled up in bed sweating ridiculously, and I managed to force myself to class but my inner thermostat was fucked, and then I ended up staying up all night so I would get drugs today) I started thinking about a story that starts, "The first time I knowingly ate human flesh..." and so when I got home I had to start writing it.

That's not what freaked me out. One of the other people is essentially my brother-in-law - not that you can tell from what's written, which is only about 400 words, but the one character point he has, yeah, that's where he came from - and I just implied that they later killed and ate him. And my POV character only comments on the loss of his cooking skills. Actually, the whole roast dinner is inspired by the meal we had at their house last weekend. (At the end of that visit, sister commented that I had "hardly said a word," which ties in with last post somewhat; but I was comfortably quiet, for most of it, just didn't really have anything to say, especially since I was already on the cannibal track.)

Anyways! Stuff, me, has been up and down, therapy has been happening and I hate it but that probably means it's working, progress on the flat is slow (but the other day I tidied what was hopefully the last big mess, a pile of dust and ash, and wound up with black snot), also I bought a Logic Puzzles magazine and have been obsessing over that somewhat. Had a 'talk' with parentals at the weekend which may or may not have helped; complained that dad said fuckall and got about two words out of him, that sort of thing.

Also Miriam gave me copies of "Murder Ballads" by Nick Cave and The Bad Seeds, which is my latest play-over-and-over-and-over, which probably is not leading to a brain full of sweetness and light, but it's such fun, especially "The Curse of Millhaven".

Anyway, I have achieved, I went out and I have made stuff and I have even written a little for the first time in aaaaaaages, so, go me! and now I shall sleep, if I can.

I went to sleep at a decent hour last night, resulting in being awake at an indecent hour on this sunny Sunday morning (and now I have said that, the rain will return). I had to get up and placate my belly.

I would like to go back to sleep but it does not seem like it will happen.

i would like a lot of things that do not seem like they will happen.

I am actually in a reasonable mood at the moment so I will shut up before I mess that up.